You deserve it. I think I am newly convinced of this idea. I have struggled for much of my life with trying to earn things. I still believe in hard work and commitment, I am not suggesting that bachelors degrees be handed out willy-nilly. But amongst calorie counting, productivity schedules and the barrage of emails from LinkedIn highlighting the various promotions of people I only half-know, I sometimes feel like I’m trying too hard to earn the wrong thing.
I can appreciate striking a balance between indulgence and self-control. Take food for example. Let’s say you are at a buffet, piling your plate up with food. You return again and again until the pleasure of eating is replaced with the ache of regret and indigestion. Now, imagine instead that after your reasonably portioned meal, you spoil yourself and have beautiful, silky chocolate mouse and a glass of amaretto. There is a marked difference in these two approaches, and I am advocating for the latter. Sometimes spoiling yourself is fun, and there shouldn’t be any guilt in that.
I have been the gorge-on-everything-at-the-buffet person. I have also given calorie counting a fair shot. So I know the allure a good tiramisu has, but I can also appreciate the consideration that goes into whether or not you want to give up your hard won calorie deficit. I would often grab that square of tiramisu and while eating it, think: Oh, I’ll have to run 7km instead of 5km tomorrow. And I should take the stairs this week. If I was the chef who made that tiramisu, I’d be really irritated that you were so distracted while eating my dessert.
That’s what I mean when I say that I needed to earn a slice of cake. I would justify my actions through counter actions. Each bite of something sweet now, means an extra 5 minutes on the bike later. I feel like that thought pattern is so unhealthy, all it does is create and reinforce patterns of guilt. And I would do the exact same thing with time to rest, days without exercise, buying myself something I wanted. I had to earn it all.
Please don’t use my words irresponsibly by taking them out of context, but I trust you will not. You don’t need to earn a little free time, a slow day or a gorgeous, shiny panna cotta. You deserve it! Just save me a spoonful, okay?